There

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."


What does this mean to me? Well, when I was in the eighth or ninth grade, Mrs. Parker had us write an essay on any topic. I chose the golden rule.  (See photo of Mrs. Parker looking at me for making a paper airplane in class).

I cannot remember exactly what words I used in the essay - but the gist of it was that I felt it was important to live by that rule. I really did, even as a teenager, treat those others who were around me with respect, whether they deserved it or not. Why not? What would it cost me?

The rewards, although not sought after, were plenty. Treat others with respect, and sometimes you'll be surprised at the results. You may find friends in the most unexpected of places. It doesn't matter that the Other is different from you, of a lower or higher class, intelligent or not. It doesn't matter. It doesn't even matter if they're a jerk. It's been my experience that people are often jerks because they're unhappy or tense or because they don't realize they are. But me being a jerk back wouldn't help their situation in any way. Ever. So I treat them with respect. Over time, if I know them that long, sometimes I earn a grudging respect from them, even when others don't. Sometimes things never change, but ... Sometimes they do. But this isn't about the jerks we sometimes run into in life......

A few months ago, someone asked me to help them pick out a computer. I did so, then went and helped set it up. Whilst I was working on it, I was asked if I'd look at a neighbor's printer. I went over to the neighbor, and looked at the printer. There was nothing at all wrong with it - but the software they were using to print from would not wrap when it reached the edge of the page so the text would be cut off when sent to the printer. Internet Explorer 5 behaved that way, and upgrades were available all the way up to 8. I suggested they upgrade to 7 or 8 which would resize the page and print it properly, and for free, and then I left.

It turns out that when they updated that, they also upgraded something else (at my recommendation) that broke Windows totally. It was, I'd consider it, a manufacturing defect. The details aren't so important - the point was, they called me back and said, "We did what you suggested, and now our computer won't turn on." I looked at the company's website and the top listing for support for that model was a problem with doing the Windows upgrades having a conflict on that model. And a link to a fix. So I downloaded software and put it on a cd, and went and fixed the pc for them.

While I was there, we started talking about our hobbies and interests. She was into various papercrafts, cardmaking, and the like. While I am into photography. After I had her computer running again, I logged onto my page and showed her my favorite picture - and she recognized the church in the scene. She immediately went to the phone and called her friend, who was a member there, and described it to her.

Long story short, I donated a print to that friend, and showed her my book that I had published the year before. When she wanted one, I told her that I'd sell it to her for the regular price, but she could take $5 off the price and donate it to the church instead of me. It just seemed like the thing to do. Why not?

And as it turns out, she sold a copy here and there to several of her friends and fellow parishoners... In all, I sold 28 books through her. The $5 per copy that went back to the church was matched by another organization, and so the church earned $280 on the book sale! I originally offered the donation because I was moved to do so. The photo of that church moved me to explore photography in a more active way than ever before. It was the thing to do. Why not return $5 to the church that had helped inspire me to do more. It was the 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you' mentality. And the $5 became $280 which made a real difference in their budget.

But rewind that a bit. The first request was from a friend to help with a computer problem. Then I met a friend of the friend, and then through her met a friend of the friend of my friend. And now because I have three friends (and more) instead of one, the church earned $280 towards some much needed repairs. And I made enough profit to pay for a few more copies that I gave to family as gifts.

I could have told my friend that I was too busy (and I was!!). But as a result of the investment, I made new friends, continued along my journey a few more steps... and the church benefitted.

And what started this ramble? Love. Yes, love. When you apply the golden rule to your life in a way that affects those around you, do so out of your heart, or don't bother. Don't do unto them because you are currying favor. Don't do for them because you want something. Don't care for someone in an attempt to make them care for you. Show respect, and express love, with no hope or desire for return. If you love them, help them repair their wings and fly. If they fly away, give thanks because they are able, and if they return and love you back then good. But don't do ANYTHING because you want something. Do it because you care.

After awhile, it can become a habit, a lifestyle. You may find yourself on the Road to... There.


And There is where we all need to try to be.